When it comes to baby gear, we try hard to be minimalists. We really don’t want our house loaded with junk—swing, bouncy seat, bumbo, play gym, exercauser, doorway jumper, pack n play, crib, etc. etc. etc. They’re all handy but we don’t need ALL of them. With that spirit, I really, really didn’t want to have a baby bathtub. My parents never had one; they just gave baby baths in the sink (or in the shower and handed off the clean, wet baby to the other parent). My main beef with the plastic baby tub is that they take up a lot of space when they’re not in use. We may have many babies coming and going through the years (and some staying, of course, like this one!). Storage is at a premium around here. The kitchen sink was working for the first month until Precious started getting more active and I was concerned that slippery, soapy baby was going to whack her head on the hard edge of the sink. So… I broke down and bought one of these. The Safety 1st Kirby Inflatable Tub.
I LOVE it! I was just happy that it collapses down into the size of a pillow case when it’s not in use but it’s actually really handy too. It’s considered a toddler tub for use in between the baby bath tub and before using the regular bath tub. I think it’s fabulous for babies, though. It fits nicely in the regular bath tub, fills quickly with the faucet and has soft bouncy sides. I was thrilled to discover that she can hold herself up with her legs when we put her in it sideways. Also, she can lean over the side when it’s time to wash her backside. Perfect! I definitely recommend this to anyone with the same storage concerns as I have. Plus it’s only $15 with free shipping.
When we don’t have any babies around, I think this will be a fun pool toy or even a mini splash pool for the backyard.
Because we are selling our house and haven’t started building our new home yet, we had to put our home on hold with DCS. That means we won’t be accepting any new foster placements for a while. It could end up being almost a year, which is hard because we feel really burdened for the kids who need places to go and parents to love them, especially around the holidays. It breaks my heart to have to say no to a call…and we had been getting a couple calls a week before we asked our case manager to take our name of the list for now.
One particular call was so hard to say no to. Usually the placement worker starts off with just the child(ren)’s age(s) and gender(s) and that’s as far as the conversation goes unless we say we’re interested. But as we were driving home from Thanksgiving in Pennsylvania, I got a call and the worker went straight into describing the situation. It was for a 6 year old boy whose mother had been shot by her boyfriend the night before. Their only family was in another country. Our hearts were so broken for that boy and we really wanted to say yes. Jason, my dad and I took a moment to pray for the kiddo, poor guy. (My mom was napping at the time.) It was even more heartbreaking to hear about the story on the news in the following days and to talk to my friend who is an ER nurse at the hospital where his 8-month pregnant mom was taken. The baby also died. So sad.
But, we don’t want to say yes, welcome a child into our home and then have to send him or her off to another foster just because we’re moving. It wouldn’t be fair to the kid. We want to be available for as long as we’re needed for the child—forever, if that’s how the situation works out. We’re building a bigger home so we can have room for more children but in the meantime, it’s difficult to not be able to do more to help. I’m afraid I might just have to become a foster parenting advocate and try to recruit more people to become foster parents.
Precious’ mother requested two more visits before she surrenders her parental rights to us. I really wasn’t sure what to expect from our first meeting. We met her mother—let’s call her Brave, because she is—once before at a meeting at DCS and it didn’t go real well. But at this visit, the interactions between Brave and Precious were much better than I expected and for that I’m thankful. As awkward as it was and considering what a mess this all is, I realize now how truly valuable an open adoption can be.
Because we love Precious so much, I find it impossible to not care about Brave. Even if we’re angry about things that happened to Precious in the past, I see so much value in Brave. She holds a wealth of information about Precious’ family medical history, her ethnicity and heritage, her biological half-siblings, etc. The most valuable thing to me is to witness Brave’s love for Precious. There is no doubt that Precious is loved and wanted.
I call her Brave because what she is doing requires so much courage. She’s obviously a smart woman who has made some really bad choices. And she knows it. She openly admits that she made mistakes, putting her vices before her children. Brave is working hard to get her life back on track. Even so, she wants to release Precious to us so we can adopt her because she believes it’s what’s best for her and for us. Now that takes a lot of strength.
As much as God loves adoption, He loves restoration. I would love to see Brave’s life redeemed. And I am so thankful for the gift of Precious. It’s far from a picture-perfect story but I’m thankful Jason and I could be available for Precious when she needed us and to hear Brave say she’s thankful too—that means so much.
Could you imagine loving your child so much that you would willing let her go? She’s very brave. We’re eternally grateful.
• Last week I was “in” court by speaker phone. That’s the third time I’ve been in court in the past month. Oh, how my life has changed.
• Precious had her first “solid” food this weekend, if rice cereal counts as a solid. She seemed to like it but learning how to swallow it will take some time.
• My mom was asked to testify at a brunch for her bible study/prayer group this week, about the miracle God did for us and Precious. She asked if I’d say something afterward. I wrote a 5 minute speech and I’ve rehearsed it in front of Photo Booth five times because I get nervous speaking in front of groups. But I have a lot to say. (In case you haven’t noticed…)
• We had the first of two court-ordered, pre-TPR, supervised visits with Precious’ birth mom last week. It felt so strange going into it—it’s a mess and the situation is unnatural in so many ways—but it went much better than I expected. That’s a whole blog post in itself.
• I’m really thankful for the adoption attorney we found. She seems super amazing and her price is great.
• Thank you to all of you who have donated to our adoption fundraiser! Just through this blog post, we’ve already collected over $500. We are blessed and amazed. You guys are the best!
• I keep finding money lately. Mostly quarters. In random places.
• I helped my parents put up their Christmas tree on Saturday and then on Sunday my mom helped me with ours. (Jason is in Texas.) Precious loves how shiny and sparkly it is. She’s gonna make Christmas so much more fun this year.
• Our house, our beloved MCM ranch, is officially on the market now. I’m sad because I love it but I’m also excited about the new season we’re moving into. I am not really looking forward to keeping the house clean ALL THE TIME…
I’ve seen a lot of clever ideas for documenting children’s growth through monthly portraits. I missed out on the first two months of Precious’ life but I’m very thankful we were able to become her parents at just two months and one day old. She’s already been with us more of her life than she’s been without us. I started taking monthly photos on her 3-month birthday. The plan is to always use this quilt that her Great Aunt Linda made as a backdrop and add just one (or two) accessories to a plain white onesie.
I’m really loving this age. At four months she’s sleeping 12 uninterrupted hours at night. Praise the Lord! She’s eating 5-6 ounces of formula 5x a day. Precious is starting to work on rolling. My mom reports that she rolled from her stomach to her back once but we haven’t seen it happen since. She’s working hard on going from back to belly, swinging her legs until she flops onto her side. Precious has just in the last week started laughing—only for her daddy so far—and grabbing toys and putting them in her mouth. She hasn’t taken a pacifier since the thrush bout over a month ago and has become a thumb-sucking expert. She can quickly sooth herself when she’s sleepy or upset but doesn’t over use it. Precious is still just as happy and easy-going as ever. She’s a wonderful little girl.
We spent Thanksgiving at my sister and brother-in-law’s house in Philadelphia this year because they have a newborn, my sweet little niece Iris. It was so nice to finally meet her! Also, my siblings got to meet Precious. Here’s some photo overload from the long weekend:
Lovely table setting
My sister Jessica looking awesome as a mama.
My dad and my brother-in-law Jeff
Iris getting burped by Grandpa – the best baby burper
Grandpa and Grandma with Iris
My brother, Aaron and his wife Laura meeting our Precious on turkey day. In 2 months they’ll be welcoming their own little cutie into the world.
This is my favorite picture from the weekend.
Time to eat! Thankful that both babies slept through the meal.
Iris has a really cool mural painted in her nursery.
Precious’ hair is growing in nicely. I love her swirl.
Grandma and Grandpa with their grandkids. Two granddaughters added to the family in 2 months and a grandson on his way in January.
Do you ever accidentally pick out matching outfits for you and your baby?
A couple of firsts over the weekend: grabbing toys and putting them in her mouth AND giggling/laughing out loud!
Thanksgiving 2011. I can’t think of a better time to share the sweet face of our little Precious girl. Getting full custody of her last week was an unexpected gift and wonderful blessing. God is so good!
Jason has been working on an acoustic guitar lullabies album to be dedicated to our sweet daughter. The whole album should be done in early 2012 but since we suddenly need to come up with several thousand dollars for a private adoption attorney to settle all this mess, Jason has decided to release one song early as an adoption fundraiser. The first song is “Hush Little Baby.” I know I’m biased but it’s a truly beautiful, layered finger-style guitar rendition. Think Phil Keaggy, Tommy Emmanuel, Chet Atkins style. I can’t wait to hear the rest!
Click here to make a minimum donation of $1 and I will email an mp3 of the song, “Hush Little Baby” by Jason Ahlbrandt within 3 business days. It’ll be well worth your dollar, I promise. (Of course, if you’re motivated to give more than a dollar, that would be tremendously appreciated!) Thank you for your help!
This is the time of year for thankfulness and boy, do I have a lot to be thankful for!
I have a handsome, talented, strong, supportive, hard-working husband and best friend. We have a delightful and beautiful 4-month-old little girl. We got 2 new nieces this year and several friends had precious new babies born, too. We live in a lovely little mid-century house where we get to express our creativity. We have reliable jobs working with great people. We have wonderfully encouraging friends and family near and far, some in our neighborhood, across town, across the country and through this here blog. We became parents this year, first to Ladybug for 5 sweet weeks. We’ve taken a big step towards expanding our family in the near future—I’m looking forward to telling you about it in the next few weeks. And, what I am most thankful for: God has been so good to us! The miracle He worked for Precious last week? Don’t even get me started. This year has been the most challenging of my life in many ways but without a doubt the most exciting, rewarding, joy-filled and purpose-driven. God has sustained me, filled me when I was empty and empowered me to keep trudging on when I wanted to flop down and quit. His love and faithfulness never wane.
Thank you, God, for blessing me way beyond what I deserve.
And thank you, blog reading friends, for following along on this adventure with us. You could be procrastinating your to-do list anywhere on the interwebs but you chose to waste your time here with me, listening to our story, cheering us on, and I sincerely appreciate it.
This song, “Thankful” by Jonny Lang has been running through my head the past week.
Graphic designer, MCM interior design enthusiast, wife to amazing guitarist and hard working realtor, mama—by way of foster care, adoption and biology—and follower of Jesus Christ.
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