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It’s Easier to Say No

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Things are good here in our little family. They’re not perfect, not necessarily easy—I mean, we do have a toddler who is testing the limits of her independence and the sincerity of our words everyday—but things are good. Really good. We love our daughter to the moon and back. We have a good rhythm and rhyme, the three of us. Any gut-level desires to parent a child have been satisfied by our dear girl. We could be done adding to our family. It would be easy.

As I consider taking the plunge into foster parenting again, it feels completely differently this time. Last time it was just Jason and me. Why not? we reasoned. We didn’t have a good reason to say no.

This time around we have our precious little one to consider. Her safety. Her feelings. Her parental attention. It would be so easy to say no this time. No, we can’t bring strangers, little aliens, into our home again. This time we could use our daughter as an excuse. We would be justified. We have our daughter to look out for and those other kids are not our problem.

As I rocked my daughter last night, I looked down at her sweet little face and deep, brown eyes and told her for the millionth time how much I love her, what a wonderful gift she is, how special she is and how thankful I am to be her Mommy. And then I remembered… It would have been easy to say no to her call, too. It would have been easier to go on as just the two of us, me and Jason, and never have to step out into the dark unknown of foster parenting.

We could have said no and we would have missed out one of the greatest blessings in our lives.

Our home is not physically ready for us to reopen as foster parents. The “next kids” room is not assembled yet and we still need some safety locks installed in the kitchen and medical/cleaning products closet. But mentally I’m getting ready to say YES.

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3 Responses to It’s Easier to Say No

  1. A beautiful post with so much love for family. “As I rocked my daughter last night, I looked down at her sweet little face and deep, brown eyes and told her for the millionth time how much I love her, what a wonderful gift she is, how special she is and how thankful I am to be her Mommy. ” Not so long ago, my son went into a typical terrible 2 and 3 but the joy he gave us was and is far worth anything and everything else. Happy New Year.

  2. lifeat807 says:

    Yay! We have had the same conversations. Our ultimate decision was the same – how could we say no? We relicensed and before our paperwork was even complete, we had a call to take a sibling group. While we only licensed for 1, we agreed to 2, and it has been such a blessing. Can’t wait to see the next chapter of your story unfold!

  3. anniegoat says:

    I can’t wait to follow you through your newest adventures as a family of 4 (plus).

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